Trying to have a conversation on the phone with a mom who is home with her children is like talking to someone with Tourrette’s Syndrome. In the middle of sentences they yell out random things and make it very difficult to follow along with the conversation. I do it too. Since almost all of my friends have small children at home, almost all of my phone conversations with friends go something like this one I had this morning while chatting with a friend who was home with her almost two year old.
Me: Hey! How’s it going? Enjoying your day off?
Her: Hi! Yep, just doing some laundry and YOU DON’T BITE! cleaning up around the WHY ARE YOU BITING ME? house.
Me: Do you have plans for the weekend?
Her: Oh, not much, just some errands GO SIT WITH YOUR BABIES to run and thought about taking the boys to a OH YOU WANT TO MAKE MUFFINS? movie, but I’m still debating if we will COME ON, NO go.
Me: That’s fun, what movie?
Her: I was thinking LEAVE THE TOILET PAPER ALONE about “Rio 2”. What are your WHAT IS YOUR DEAL plans?
Me: Oh just baseball games and running around like crazy people as usual.
Her: Yeah I hear ya. DO YOU WANT A SNACK?
Me: Um, sure, oh wait, you’re not talking to me.
Her: WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM?
Me: Wait… is that for me, or no?
And this is why my friends and I text 99% of the time.