I blame it on the plunges!

This morning I woke up to “WAKE UP!  I OVERSLEPT!!!”  I wondered why Big Bird was yelling at me but then I realized that I must have been dreaming about Big Bird (weird) and that it was actually my husband yelling (and actually sounding a little like Big Bird).  So we quick jumped out of bed, threw clothes that most likely don’t match on the two oldest kids, I managed to put some kind of messy ponytail in my daughter’s hair, slapped their shoes on, and got them in the car so my husband could take them to school.  They didn’t brush their teeth.  Again.  Luckily they eat breakfast at school so at least I know they got fed!  Sadly, this morning was not all that different from most mornings, even those on which we don’t oversleep.

After the riff raff left, I went back to bed for a glorious 30 more minutes!  Then I got up and dressed and got Little Man up and fed him a banana, a mini muffin, and some milk, and then we headed to the gym.  He walked into the daycare there like he owns the place waving to all his little peeps and I trudged up the stairs to do the 9:15 class.  The class is called Triple Fit (though in my case it should be called Not at All Fit) and involves a cycle of 4 minutes of cardio, 3 minutes of leg exercises, and 2 of arm exercises.  I was happily exercising along (“happily” because I managed to find the one spot in the room where there is actually cold air blowing through a vent) and was about 3/4 finished with the class.  I was in the middle of doing Plunges.  Plunges are jumping lunges and are supposed to look like this:

Basically you do a lunge and then jump up, switch legs, and do a lunge on the other side.  Although, when I do plunges, it looks more like this: Anyway, I’m plunging along and, out of the corner of my eye I see a woman dressed all in black with long sleeves and and pants slink into the exercise room.  Ooh, a Dementor I thought, but then I almost fell over plunging, plunged over if you will, so I quickly turned my focus back to the task at hand.  A little while later I turned my head slightly and almost shit my pants when the black figure was standing right next to me and staring at me! I almost screamed, but then I realized she was an employee from the daycare and I thought Great!  Little Man must have shit HIS pants!  Oh, but no.  It was worse. Much worse.  Black figure told me that he had vomitted all over the playroom.

So, I grabbed my things and hurried downstairs where I was greeted by another of the employees running past me on her way to the bathroom where she proceeded to vomit.  Apparently, trying to clean up my offspring’s banana, mini muffin and milk-filled puke was too much for her to handle.  Amateur.  I walked over to poor Little Man who said “uh oh” and then he and I cleaned it up the best we could.  I looked at the employee and thought do you see that even my 20 month old, who is apparently sick, is more of a daycare worker than you?  I mean, really, I’m sure my child isn’t the only child who has ever gotten sick at a daycare for crying out loud.

So, after we got that all cleaned up, I apologized profusely, and we headed home.  I gave Little Man a bath, and then it was time for lunch.  I was nervous to feed him, but wanted him to have something, so I thought I was going the safe route with orange jello and a dry piece of toast.  Apparently, Little Man thought the orange jello was better suited for his hair than his tummy.Sigh.   Just another day in the life, I suppose.  Time for bath #2!

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3 thoughts on “I blame it on the plunges!

  1. When my son was little I never could get through an aerobics class without being paged. It was always something. He has scars on his knee from a swing spill that drove woodchips up into his knee. He may need counseling when he remembers having to wait naked in the bathroom for them to page me, me to run to the car for the 4th set of clean clothes (I always brought him in with two after the finger painting/butt painting attempt) as the rest of the class came through to wash their hands for lunch. Finally I gave up. I got tired of 30-45 minutes of an hour class – invested in exercise DVDs and a lifecycle. Now that he’s gone to college I might be able to finish a class.

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